Friday, November 24, 2006

Haiz.. Really disappointed with all my friends. I hate this kind of thing. I really hate it. But i think i am trying to get used to it though. Why? Why i dont have any true friend? Am i really so nice to bully? Last time i am a quiet girl where everybody think that i am "sotong" girl and nice to bully. Now i try to become cheerful but still kana bullied. Why? Why everybody think i am good to bully? Cos u all think i am stupid, blur and i will not know? I like to keep things to myself. Cos say out also nobody will bother you or help you solve it. They will only say things that wont help. I like to act blur. Maybe sometime i am really blur and sometime i pretend to be blur. I dont want myself to get hurt so i pretend. But in the end, nothing ever changes. I still cant prevent myself from getting hurt.

I used to think. Friends are to help each other and they will stand by your side when you need them. Now friend is to make used and become hi-bye friend or even stranger after going separate ways. Why i will change my thinking? Haax.. It is because of my friend cycles.

WanPeng, do u remember what you ask me that day when we help michelle celebrate her birthday when i am getting off the mrt? Haax.. Actually I knew you will ask it. I only dont want to spolit the atmosphere at that time so i act blur. Do you know what is my actual answer to that? You are definately not my good friend. You ask that because you do not trust me and want to gossip that behind of me. If you really trust me, you wont ask about it. If you do not trust me, whatever i said you also wont believe. So what is the point of asking? There is no meanings. And i hate friend that like to talk bad thing behind her friend. Please.. Have i ever talk your bad thing behind you to michelle they all? Can you put yourself in other shoe? If i gossip about your bad thing behind you will you be happy? Haax.. Funny right.. I am thinking if you know what i write will you feel guilty or angry? And one last thing.. karen neo is innocent. If even such a obedient girl also cant escape from your mouth and that's it. Then think of yourself please.

Haiz.. Michelle.. I also a bit disappointed with you though.. Last time you call me and you seem to suspect me and also dont believe me. Haiz... Forget about it.. I only want to write out all the unhappy thing and forget about it if can.

I am so sad.. Why everyone in the world is so selfish? Why nuwa godness create people to be like that. Why cant she provide us a more beautiful world. Haiz.. Actually, I dont expect a good birthday celebration this year. I know there are people who will pop out and create problem. If you want to go earlier because next following day got morning lesson then go ahead. I wont blame you. Just dont spoilt my mood and my celebration. And please dont pull people to go back with you or force yourself to stay if nobody agree to go with you. And please dont blame me for walking away straight if you successfully pull away people to go home with you.. Let me make clear everything first. And i dont believe you will go home sleep early if it was your birthday celebration. I remember last year we have a bbq celebration and we stay at east coast whole night and the following day we go for lesson straight away. We nearly fall asleep at the lecture hall out of exhaustion. Haax.. I know i am not worth for you to sacrifice your time. If not, then it is true that i am the sotong you think can bully.

Whatever.. As i had said i dont have any true friends and you all like to bully me. Let us remain like that as we are now. I dont expect much from you all.

One last thing. Please dont tell so many people that i am printing the marketing textbook if nobody will offer to help me carry the textbook. I dont like to please people for favour. It is hard on myself. Why must i see other people face where i can do thing myself. Initally i only want to help you all as we dont understand the lecture and we have a lousy tutor. Now i dont see why i have to suffer myself when there is nobody who will care about me. Thinking that i am too petty? Then let it be bahz.. Whatever le..

Just remember that I am a very petty and a very "ji chou" people.

♥ the world will turn WILD.
3:42 PM